Just when I think I can't do it...

This hasn't been easy. It has been fun sometimes. I'm beginning to feel weighed down by knowing how much money I have spent on this little adventure so far and how I just don't feel like I'm going to be able to do it. I knew this would be hard - and I had hoped I would've had more time to devote to training. But my life continues to get in the way and this dream continues to take a back seat. Regardless, I still find a way to get out the door at least once a week, sometimes twice or more. I'm not making the kind of progress I had hoped to by this point, but I guess I still have time.

Tonight I had some good times and some rough times - all in the matter of a 5K. As I started to get discouraged, I began to think about where I started less than 2 months ago. My first run was on July 7 - I went 1.78 miles in 27:09 minutes and averaged a 15 minute mile. Just 16 runs later, I ran just a tiny bit further than a 5K again tonight and took 2 minutes off that original pace. No, this isn't going to happen overnight, but it is going to happen. As disappointed as I was feeling earlier, looking at my stats right now I feel pretty good. It puts a smile on my face.

My biggest victory in all this is by far the fact that I'm still heading out the door. I'm not finding excuses or reasons to stay home. Even if I can only get a short run in, I'm lacing up and hitting the road. I'm having fun - I'm enjoying it. And I'm excited when I think about my run - leading up to, during and after. I'm drinking more water, trying to eat better - sleep is still an issue but I'll keep trying to get more. I need to make a concerted effort to cross train a little better. It's hard enough for me to get my training runs in 2-3 times a week that finding time to cross train is near impossible, but I know I need to do it. Going to look at the YMCA schedule again and see what I can figure out.

Have my first 5K race in over a month on Monday. Pretty excited to see how I do and if I can set a PR.

Tonight's Stats:
3.29 miles
43:19 minutes
13:09 pace
If the half was today: approx 3:10:00

Goals for next run:
Resting tomorrow before my 5K race on Monday. Timed and certified. Really want to PR, which will require a 12 minute pace.  Not sure if I can do it, but I am damn sure going to try.

Today's Inspiration....

UGH...

Tonight was awful. I wasn't really in the mood to run. I don't feel real good and I'm tired. Yesterday, I really wanted to run but wasn't able to. Tonight, I didn't want to run and went outside. Go figure. My goal was 4 miles - I really, really, really need to get a four mile run in. I got out the door too late and quickly realized 4 miles wasn't going to happen. So I focused on achieving at least a 3.1 and do my best to just finish. 

My mental block took over. It was warm and quite possibly the most humid condition I've ran in so far. I struggled to breathe - it was rough. I've been running non-stop for a mile the past few runs - tonight I didn't even make a half a mile. That's when I couldn't fight my negative thoughts. I was hard on myself, I was upset, I was disappointed. From that point on it was a struggle just to run - to get myself convinced I could run more. 

In the end, my average pace sucked. But, I got in a 5K and then some. I need to keep working on my endurance and my ability - and my confidence. I have a race on Monday - I really want to PR.

Tonight's Stats:
3.23 miles
42:15 minutes
13:04 pace
If the half was today: approx 3:08:21

Goals for next run:
Hope to get out tomorrow, but I'll be walking a ton on Thursday regardless so that will be good. Need to push to 4 miles at some point and time but I just want to get myself mentally prepared for my race on Monday.

Just have to keep moving

I didn't plan on running today - didn't figure I'd have the opportunity. But the kids woke up early and by 9 a.m. I was itching to lace up my shoes and head out the door. I got everyone ready and headed for the Y. I managed to get 3.12 miles in, but it was not easy or fun. Today was one of those runs where I kept increasing the speed of the treadmill just so I could get the run over quicker. I increased my pace by 10 seconds, which I'm excited about. I just need to get better. I'm getting discouraged, because I don't feel like I'm doing better. I know I am - I ran the first 1.25 miles today which is another milestone. But I struggled - mentally and physically. I know that's normal and is going to happen. But, it doesn't help my mental game any. Anyway, I got out the door, got a run in and overall, I feel great.

Tonight's Stats:
3.12 miles
37:12 minutes
11:55
If the half was today: approx 2:52.14

Goals for next run:
May not get out again until Monday or Tuesday. Going to push it to 4 miles regardless of where I run. I have a 5K race coming up on the 2nd so I need to get going.

I ran a mile!

I did it! I ran a mile for the first time since I started running. I felt good - I didn't want to stop. In fact, I may have ran a little more than a mile, but I know for a fact, I ran a mile. I went back to the Y tonight - Mark is home and I could have gone outside. But, there was an attack on a jogger down in Oklahoma this weekend that's garnered national attention. I'm concerned about copy cats, so I figured I'd give it a week or so to die down before heading back out to the pavement. Mark also bought me some pepper spray last night as well - hope I don't mace myself....

Before my run tonight, I tried a Clif Gel Shot for the first time. I have read about the different gels and blocks and how you need to try them long before an endurance race so you can figure out which you like and how they affect your body. Well tonight, I figured out how it would affect my body - I'm pretty positive that's the main reason I ran that first mile. I also used the towel to cover the digital display of the treadmill, preventing myself from analyzing the time and letting my mental state take over. I just ran...and ran...and ran. I probably didn't need to stop either - but I let the mental take over and decided I should let my legs take a break. Was also a little concerned about hurting myself after running so far for the first time.

I also finally got my 5K in under 38 minutes. I ran a 37:20 - I couldn't believe it. Tonight just felt good all the way around - and I can't wait to go back out and run again.

Tonight's Stats:
3.11 miles
37:20 minutes
12:03
If the half was today: approx 2:37

Goals for next run:
Not sure where I'm going to run next - whether at the Y or outside. Also not sure if it'll be tomorrow or Thursday. Regardless, I'd like to do another 5K under 38 and try to run the first mile again.

Just keep running, just keep running

Made my way to the Y again tonight and I felt so good. I tried to maintain my 3:1 interval but it was hard to stop - I wanted to keep running a couple times. But, I stuck to my plan fully expecting to hit 3.1 miles. Well, the stupid treadmill stopped at 30 minutes and I didn't have a chance to look down and see what my mileage was at the time - so, so much for that. I have no idea how far I went. I kept going through the 5 minute cool down and managed to run for 4 of those minutes because I was so angry with the machine. At the end, the summary said I ran 4.5 miles - there's no way. I don't know what those machines do, but I'm not sure they are keeping track of my mileage properly. So, I guess when I go to the Y from now on, I'll just focus on running for an amount of time at a certain pace, versus distance - I'll use math to figure my mileage from there.

My running pace stayed around 12:07 and my walking pace was around 15:30. With the amount of walking and running I did during those 25 minutes, I figure I went about 2.8 miles again.

At the end of the day, I felt good. Really good. And that's all that matters.

The rest of the week is going to be really crazy for me, so I'm not sure what my training schedule will be like. If I'm able to run outside, I'll shoot for a 5K. If I run at the Y, we'll shoot for 40 minutes at a 12 minute run pace/15 minute walk pace.

The journey continues...

I am so frustrated right now. Life is not cooperating with my training plans and I'm only getting 1 run in each week for the past couple weeks. That is not going to cut it. I'm already having a hard time convincing myself this was the right thing to do - the negative little voice is taking over. I'm beginning to think I've bit off more than I can chew.

We joined the Y yesterday and tonight I was able to get a run in. My goal of a 5K was cut short because this computer nerd was apparently not capable of figuring out the treadmill. Oh well. I at least got a couple more miles in and that's most important.

I have also laid out my competition schedule for the rest of the year. I've identified at least 2 competitive races each month to run with the exception of August - since Mark is out of town most of this month there's really no opportunity for me to run in races until Sept. I'm excited about the slate of races I've set up - leading up to a 10K in October and a 15K just two weeks later in November. It's a tall order but I really hope these small goals help me reach my large goal in February. I will also have 2 opportunities to submit times for the half-marathon and hopefully get a closer corral. I decided tonight that my goal is to avg a 12 minute mile - that will give me 90 minutes of cushion time to get some pictures, walk a little longer if I need to and just take time to enjoy the race.

I booked our hotel yesterday. Little bit of a gut check at the cost, but it will be worth it to be at a Disney resort and utilize the hotel transportation on the morning of the race - for both myself and Mark. I had to remind myself that I picked up a third (yes third) job to cover this trip and that it really will be a second honeymoon for Mark and I - with freaking half-marathon crammed in the middle.

Tonight's run was on a treadmill.  The display didn't give me a lot of the details I hope to have but I have a good feeling about my guesstimates. I also worked on perfecting my 3/1 intervals...they were more like 3/1.5 and 3/2 after a while, but I'll get better.

Tonight's Stats:
2.84 miles
35:00 minutes
12:45 avg min/mil (this is a guesstimate. I tried to run at 12 and walk at about 16)
If the half was today: approx 2:48

Goals for next run:
I hope to get back to the Y tomorrow. If I do, I'm getting my 5K in no matter what. I really want to get it in at under 38 minutes.

Does this ever get easier???

I haven't blogged in a while because, well, I haven't ran in while. Tonight was my first run in over a week. I was just not able to find time to get out the door, even for quick run. And it was bugging me. I wanted to get out and run. 

Tonight, I put my running clothes on before Mark even came home from work. That way, I'd be psyched up and ready to go. I also decided to try a Clif Bar for the first time, eating it about 1.5 hours before I headed out the door. I think it helped - I never felt tired or worn out during my run. I did, however, hurt. I was too tight - way too tight. I stretched before I took off, but I have not stretched enough on my off days. I'm going to have to do something about that.

I tried a new trail tonight and really liked it. Sidewalks, gradual hills - I'll easily be able to run a 5K on this route. Unfortunately, it was a little desolate and that had me nervous. If I'm going to keep running this route, and I'd like to, I'm going to need to get some mace or something. I also decided to start trying intervals runs. Usually, I just run until I'm tired, walk until I feel better and then start all over again. Tonight, I started out at 4 min run/1 min walk intervals. Soon, I found myself around 3/1 and 3/2 - need to train myself to run those intervals. But, i liked it - a lot. I think I'm going to try to make that my new training regimen. The 3/1 and 4/1 felt really good and I had a great good pace for my first mile (which is probably also what killed me in the long run.)

Half way through my run tonight, a deer ran across the road from me. About 5 minutes later a jackass drove by and threw a half empty can of beer at me. Pretty eventful night overall.

Todays's Stats:
2.55 miles
33:32 minutes
13:09 avg min/mil
If the half-marathon was today: appox. 3:09

Goals for next run
Going to try to get another 5K in tomorrow night. Really want to come in under 40 minutes. 

I hate sitting around...

Well, let me rephrase that. I love to sit around - I just want to get out and run too. Unfortunately, looks like this week will be a lot like last with a lack of training options being available. Another reason I am so happy I have more than 200 days to train for this. Mark's work schedule has just been so crazy, and my sister came to town last night, and then it was raining cats and dogs this morning.... I know, I know, excuses. Luckily, I  think Mark and I are going to join our local Y today or next week, which will give me the ability to train if Mark is out of town or running late. I will also help me add something new to my training regimen. I know if I simply run for the next 204 days, I'm going to get burnt out. They have some great classes that I'm excited to try and incorporate into my training.

Heading to the parents for a couple days again, so I'm packing my running gear and hoping for the opportunity to run either or both days. We'll see.